February 24, 2012

storyseldomtold asked: Salaam! What do you teach in Saudi? How do you like it there?

W/salaam.

Well, my time teaching in Saudi Arabia is almost up. I only have five full days left and then I’m done with this place and I’m going back home.

I teach English as a foreign language to students who are 18-20 and who have just started university.

Saudi has been tough in a lot of ways for me but I’ve managed. I’m going home in one piece and I’m pretty happy I can say that after 18 months here. It’s been really hard at times but I’ll be walking away with some pretty great memories too, alhamdulilah.

February 23, 2012

Anonymous asked: hey gurlfriend i been followin ya for a long time and lyk was wonderin if u cud pls give me sum gud advice on sum probs i been experiencin in mid life crisis situation. see i used to hav a pet dawg and i was goin to da movies dis one time and cos i didnt wanna leave Boof (dawg's name) so i took him wit me and hid him unda neath ma seat but then da chick behind me saw him n started screaming nd den da police came n prosecuted us. since u noe lots bout movies and police help out a brutha in need

Ermm… Anon… what have you been smoking? There’s so much wrong with your message that I don’t even know where to start.

First of all capital letters, correct spelling, sentence structure, grammar, and punctuation are your friends. Secondly, I’m not your girlfriend. Finally, I have no idea why you think I’d be able to help with your problems with Boof.

I don’t know what sneaking your dog in to the cinema and getting caught has to do with having a mid-life crisis. From the sound of things you certainly have more pertinent and imminent problems you need to address.

I guess my advice for you would be to leave Boof at home, get yourself to your local college and take a couple of English classes, and put down whatever it is you’ve been smoking because I don’t think it’s great for your health.

Would any of you guys like to help my anon out?

February 13, 2012

Anonymous asked: If you say your name really fast continuously, you sound like a duck! Funny anon will be funny

Oh, Anon… Thanks for making me smile. The truth is that I know saying Waq really quickly makes it sound like quack so much that I often sign emails “Waqwaq” and then add “if you say it quickly it sounds like quackquack”

(I’m sorry to go in to English teacher mode but, Anon, you actually made a sentence structure error… It’s not me who sounds like a duck but it’s my name that sounds like a duck. Saying that, if you ask nicely enough I might make a video of me sounding like a duck!)

January 26, 2012

thehalalpeniswhisperer asked: I really enjoy your blog, and came it across it from Ahmad's blog (kosmosis). Your experiences are fascinating, and I'm also quite interested in teaching in some capacity for a portion of my life.

Thank you for the compliment. It’s so cool that you found my blog and I’m glad you’ve enjoyed my ramblings.

Its’ so easy to teach English language abroad. If you want any advice or information I’d be more than happy to help you in whatever way I can.

January 2, 2012
I don’t normally shame students at my work - or in general - but this is beyond anything I’ve ever seen. This is after 15 weeks of intensive English teaching.
This has to be the worst exam script I’ve ever come across. Just look at it! Shocking!
Do you understand anything he’s talking about?
Bonus points if you can find the two words in the whole thing that are spelt correctly…

I don’t normally shame students at my work - or in general - but this is beyond anything I’ve ever seen. This is after 15 weeks of intensive English teaching.

This has to be the worst exam script I’ve ever come across. Just look at it! Shocking!

Do you understand anything he’s talking about?

Bonus points if you can find the two words in the whole thing that are spelt correctly…

December 29, 2011

Anonymous asked: What are you teaching in the Saudi?

I was asked a question almost identical to this a while ago and it brought back a whole lot of memories.

That time I gave a one sentence answer. I’ll do a little bit better this time.

I teach English (as a foreign language) to students at a university in Riyadh. I’ve been here for nearly 15 months and I’m planning on going home in just over two months. Teaching English has been fun but it has nothing to do with my educational background. Even though I teach at a university, I’m a good teacher, and the job is amazing in a lot of ways, I don’t feel like a teacher all that often.

Thanks for asking, Anon.

November 26, 2011
Just 23 days of teaching left this semester

When I think about it in that way I can’t help but let out a sigh of relief.

There are actually 24 days left but the 25th day of teaching, the last, of this semester actually falls on my birthday - the 28th of December. After that there’s an exam week and then three weeks off which will be spent by me just sitting around and doing a whole lot of nothing.

Teaching starts again in the last week of Jan and as soon as it starts I’m going to hand in my notice.

That means… 23 days of teaching on this side of the break and about 22/23 days of teaching on the other side of the break and I’m done.

The end is in sight. I pushed it back a couple of weeks because the second semester starts a little bit earlier than I thought so I’m going to work it for a month. I’d rather not but circumstances are out of my control. I have to stick it out as long as humanly possible.

I wish I could just be gone now. I don’t want to be here any more.

September 29, 2011

Anonymous asked: how do you teach/talk to the kids if you speak english and presumably they speak arabic?

How one interacts with low level students was part of the course I did. We learnt how to minimise the native language and maximise exposure of the target language in a classroom. You’d be surprised at how quickly people recognise patterns and can start using them.

September 14, 2011
Back to teaching…

It feels so good to be teaching again. It’s the first time I’ve really taught since the first week of June. That’s over three months since I’ve been in front of a classroom with any verve and vigour and, in all honesty, it feels better than I expected.

The fact that I hate it in Saudi at the moment isn’t detracting from the fact that I’m able to stand in front of 23 guys for four hours and impart knowledge. My group are fairly low level students but they’re enthusiastic about learning and they’re fun. It’s the first week so their discipline levels are good (but will deteriorate over the next few weeks). They’re eager to please me and they’re eager to work. They’re making their way through the textbook without any problems so far.

The thing that feels good about it is how I have to be on my feet, I have to think, and I have to be here mentally. There’s no way I can distract myself with other things. My thoughts don’t wander away from here. The four hours I spend with these guys is a good way to clear my head.

The other twenty hours, though… I just want to be gone from here.

September 12, 2011
I just got home from work

Alhamdulilah.

These last few days have been really tough. On Saturday I worked from 6:45am until 5:15pm. Yesterday I worked from 7:30am until 5:15pm. Not only that but I was working twice my usual workload on those days. I had to cover classes which meant I was teaching for 8 hours a day. That’s a lot when you’re only used to four.

Today it finally settled a little bit. Right now it looks like I’ve been given the AM shift at work (which I actually wanted). This morning I taught from 8am until 11:40am and then I was done with the day. I had to stay until 3:30pm but that wasn’t too bad. My class is actually fairly decent. There are a couple of characters but they’re the kind of make it fun. They’re level two but their English isn’t all that bad.

I’m so glad to be taken off double shifts. Sure I would have made another couple of thousand dollars a month but money doesn’t motivate me at all. I’d rather keep my sanity.

So yeah, the last few days were tough in a lot of ways but it finally looks like things are on track now work-wise. I have a very interesting year ahead. May Allah make it easy for me.

September 7, 2011

shathaw asked: Yeah i think one of the hardest things in life is to stay focused on good thing but we have to keep trying,you're right i was thinking of starting answering them,i answered some of them in my head but i think should write them but what stops me is my writing its horrible i make a lot of grammer mistakes i believe the best way to improve it is to read a lot i tried to read this summer so i bought some big books but i ended up not finishing any cus the translations i got tired of it,any advice?

Staying focused on the good, positive things is certainly admirable but sometimes it can be difficult. Regardless of how good your intentions are you can still get caught out, you know.

If you do start answering them, let me know because I would love to read your answers. Don’t worry about mistakes. You learn through your mistakes. Reading does help but so does exposure to the language in all areas, speaking, listening, and writing included! They’re all just as important as the other (can you tell I’m an English teacher?!). My best advice is to not give up and keep pushing yourself everyday. The fruits of your hard work will be clear soon enough. Don’t just focus on big boring books but read anything and everything.

September 4, 2011
Work today was so much better than I expected…

It was so, so brilliant to see a couple of my closest friends in Saudi Arabia back in the country and spending some time with them in work. It was as thought we weren’t apart for a day, let alone two months!

The jokes started flying instantly. There was one where a friend of mine told his wife she reminded him of me, in some small way, and we totally ripped on him because of that. The atmosphere was totally relaxed.

We people watched all the new teachers. The poor guys had no idea what was going on. They were like lost little ducklings trying to find their mummy duck. I said hi to lots of people but didn’t really talk to too many of them.

I had two exams to invigilate today and that was tiring and boring. This week at work is going to be totally hectic! We have to process 6000 students through placement tests so we can ascertain their level and assign them classes. It’s LONG! I guess it’s one of the perils of working at the largest English language teaching initiative in the world.

They’re also making me work one of the weekend days this weekend. It’s too sad!

Saying that… I’ll know within the next couple of days about something that could be pretty damn awesome coming up… I’ll share it with you as soon as it is confirmed!

September 3, 2011
Replies…

bermudianabroad said: as soon as my computer is fixed! i only get internet for 15mins or so at a time… it keeps dropping out. so i come onto tumblr to message you :P i’ll let you know when it’s steady.

Well… I always have time for you so get in touch with me whenever you want. That sucks about the quality of your net. The best way to get in touch with me is through a facebook message!

ususmama said: how old is this 7abboob?

I don’t know if you mean how old is the picture or the baby. The baby is about a year and a half and the picture was taken on Tuesday.

beauitfullybroken said: I love accents, you sound very English, though you would to a Scottish person lol. Though we both come under having british accents, just of the very varying kind :P .

I guess it’s kind of understandable that I have an English accent, though, right? At least people can understand my accent ;)

itsalwaysjustforyou said: I think you need some soup and some rest! : ) I’m going to try this out! Thanks for sharing.

I listened to your accent challenge too and it was cool! I like how you say caramel. My cold/whatever it was has almost all gone now and it was without the magic of soup.

laaavvvandthensome reblogged your audio post: Your name and username. Where you’re from. …

block

Yeh kya hai? Haha,

Yeh main ney aap se choori kiya that. Aap se nahin lekin mughe yaad he ke aap nay yeh kiya tha aur mughe acha laga tha to main ne socha ke main bhe karoon ga.

thisstoryteller replied to your post: Oh my god, that’s so weird! I’m from Bradford too, haha! But…
Weird, isn’t it? :D Same goes for me! Oh man, me and my siblings have been practically raised…well, white. And not modern white, like 1950’s white-brown children who read annuals and Charles Dickens. Especially my older sister. Bradford is not bad!

I’d much rather have a ‘white’ Bradford accent than the one most of us brownies tend to have. It’s not that I’m trying to be someone I’m not but I’ve always felt how you express yourself and the language you use is one of the most important things in life and give a very strong impression to people of who and what you are. Sound like you had a brilliant childhood :)

laaavvvandthensome replied to your post: Hahaha, I just listened to your accent challenge, and ohmygosh…
NO. They taste good. Go away.

I didn’t say they didn’t taste good. If anything I said they taste too good! What I did say is that they’re unhealthy, though.

flufflogic replied to your post: Oh my god, that’s so weird! I’m from Bradford too, haha! But my accent…
I may have to do this “accent challenge” thing once I get back off holiday.

You totally should. It’s fun! Don’t practice beforehand, though. Let it be all natural.

thisstoryteller replied to your post: Oh my god, that’s so weird! I’m from Bradford too, haha! But my accent…
Also, I didn’t read this before, I’ve done the accent challenge twice. One is Harry Potter themed, the other is normal. Which would you like to see?

Ahhh… Okay well… link me to the regular one :)

ithedivine replied to your post: My most personal post ever (tl;dr and triggers)
i tried committing suicide all the time when i was younger than 12 up until i was 15. I still think about suicide often as a way out. I always think about it when I drive and walk in busy areas. ugh it’s so horrible. i wish i didn’t but i do

Thank you for sharing your story with me. It’s not that I see it as a way out for me. It’s something that I will never, ever do, but, because I reached that point before, it’s as though it will always be ‘an option’ for me. I don’t know if that makes sense. Areas with cars going by fast are the worst! I can’t help it either. I’ve had some kind of suicidal thought at least a few times a week, if not once a day for the last 11 years. I think it’ll stay with me forever.

aaylaveau replied to your post: My most personal post ever (tl;dr and triggers)
I got sweaty and clammy while reading this. Thanks emo

I’m sorry, Aayla.

lephilosophe replied to your post: My most personal post ever (tl;dr and triggers)
This is such a powerful moment. You’re very strong to share it with us, I respect that. Have you sought professional help for your suicidal thoughts? You didn’t mention a cause, so I can’t speak directly to the issue, but I hope you’re addressing it.

This moment in itself wasn’t that powerful. I just needed to feel something at the time and needed to feel like I was in control, which I was the whole time. There wasn’t ever really a risk of me falling. I’ve seen a shrink in the past but they told me that it seemed like I was on top of my state and that I understood it and how to manage it. It’s not often I push myself to these points.

In sha Allah, the issue will be addressed with time and help from Allah and my friends.

August 15, 2011
Teaching is done!

That summer school stint is over. Today the students had their final exam and tomorrow and on Wednesday they have their speaking exams and then that’s it. All-in-all I “taught” for two weeks and there was a week of examinations. Next week we just sit around and do nothing and the week after that I’m in Dubai for the end of Ramadan and Eid (after a quick visit to Mecca - in sha Allah). Anyway… let me dish the dirt on these last couple of weeks of work.

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July 14, 2011
Speaking other languages

I’ve been thinking today about how I’m lucky that I know how to speak more than just English. As a language teacher I understand that importance of being able to speak more than just your mother tongue and I’ve really appreciated the fact that I learnt a second language the easy way. It was taught to me at the same time I learned English.

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